


Floating Alone

by Qpenguin98



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Canon Trans Character, Coming Out, Families of Choice, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nail Polish, Nonbinary Angus, Nonbinary Character, and also barry is trans, learning you're trans, u kno?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-12 20:48:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16878927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Qpenguin98/pseuds/Qpenguin98
Summary: "Right now, there’s one mystery tickling at the back of his brain, and he has no idea what to do about it."Angus has an identity crisis and Lup and Barry are well equipped to handle it.





	Floating Alone

Angus McDonald, world’s greatest detective, has been solving mysteries for years. He’s found murderers and saved cats and found hidden treasures and he even helped save the world that one time. He’s accomplished in his field, fifteen and still picking up cases on the side when he has time between teaching classes at Lucas’s school. He’s smart and good at problem solving and he’s known all of this for a long time.

But right now, there’s one mystery tickling at the back of his brain, and he has no idea what to do about it.

For the past year or so he’s been feeling… uncomfortable. That might not be the correct word, but it’s the only one he can think to use. There’s this underlying sense of tenseness and anxiety every time he goes out in the world, every time someone calls him Mr. McDonald, every time some stray person comments on his hair being too long for a respectable boy like him. Even the word boy has felt strange lately. He’d thought for a while that he was just uncomfortable because he’s growing up, but he’s not too fond of man either. And his hair he’s been growing out, likes to keep the curls longer and looser around his head and then pull them back tightly in a ponytail when he wants it out of his face. He likes the weight of it on his head and the way it feels when he twists his head and how it looks fluffed out around his face. He’s a teacher, but he much prefers that title, teacher or professor, to the well meaning “Mister”s that he gets.

He’s not really sure what to do about it. There’s an obvious answer somewhere, but he hasn’t found it yet. He’s fairly certain he’s not a girl. Things would be better if he just was one. If it were that simple he wouldn’t be having this problem. His family would be fine with that if he were a girl, and he’d have no trouble with Lucas and the school, save for the occasional rude person, and even then he’d probably have some sort of authority over them. He’s not a girl, but he doesn’t feel much like being a boy at the moment, but those are his options and he’s stuck.

To make matters worse, he’s been _wanting_ things. Wanting to wear certain things and do certain things and that should be fine! He’s a… boy, he guesses uncomfortably, and Taako’s proven time and time again that boys can wear skirts and dresses and have long hair and do traditionally feminine things and it’s fine and no one ridicules him for it. Of course, he also is one of the seven major saviors of the world, so no one’s going to ridicule him of anything these days.

So he should be just fine to wear skirts if he wants and keep his hair at the length that it is and feel perfectly comfortable with himself, but it isn’t that simple. He has no plans to cut off his hair, that’s staying on his head right where it is, but skirts and dresses and more feminine things are a bit more iffy. He may not have seen them in five years, but his parents were incredibly strict with that sort of thing. Hair kept short, clothes well fitting and entirely gendered, no feminine hobbies, nothing to make people think their son was _off_ in some way. He doesn’t mind any of those things on other people, it’s just on him that it makes him uncomfortable.

But he wants to wear skirts and he wants to paint his fingernails and he maybe even wants to wear make up a little bit.  He could ask Taako for tips and maybe some help, but every time he picks up the stone or goes to ask him when he’s home, his throat closes up and his hands get shaky and he either hangs up before he can answer or goes around him and tries to make it look casual even though he knows his breathing sounds off and his body’s too stiff.

The mystery to him is what he is. He’s got no idea. He doesn’t want to be a boy but he knows he’s not a girl but he wants to do feminine things but he can’t bring himself to do what he wants.

He’s in a store one day, there to buy a new jacket for the fall since he’s grown out of his old one, and his eye catches on a skirt. It’s a deep purple with a layer of tulle underneath it to give it a little bit of body. The fabric looks soft and so does the tulle, something that wouldn’t scratch at legs. He reaches a hand out to touch it and then snatches it back, anxiously looking around him to see if anyone is watching. There’s no one anywhere close to the area he’s in, doesn’t seem to be anyone in the store but the person running the counter up front, and they’re gazing lazily at a book, not paying attention to him.

Tentatively, Angus reaches out a hand again, brushing his fingers on the fabric. He was right, it is soft, dragging over his skin in an excellent way. He’s almost mesmerized, taking it gently between his thumb and forefinger and rubbing the skirt. The bell on the door rings and he’s snapped out of his trance, snatching one of the sizes that looks like it would fit him and shoving it under the fall coat he’s getting himself. He has the money, and he so desperately wants it.

He waits until the person that just came in goes away from the counter and walks up to it. The person there, a half elf man who looks tired of the day that hasn’t even been going on that long, looks up at him. Angus readies a story in his mind. He saw the skirt and thought that his… sister? Girlfriend? Something that doesn’t exist. Girlfriend. That his girlfriend would like it. This was her size after all. A total coincidence that it would also fit him. They can share pants. Haha.

He sets the two items of clothing onto the counter and holds his hands together anxiously. The lie is on the tip of his tongue, ready to burst out whenever it needs to, but the man doesn’t even look at him weird, just prattles off a total and accepts his money without question.

Angus hurries back to his dorm, locking the door tightly behind him. He lets out a panicked exhale, releasing the death grip he’d had on the bag. He’s alone. No one can see him like this, holding a bag with a skirt he bought himself. He takes it out gingerly, careful not to wrinkle it. The fabric looks better in this lighting, softer, deeper, and he presses his lips together.

With shaky hands he takes off his pants and pulls it up over his legs. The waist is a little loose, but it sit nicely right above his hips, swishing gently against his legs. He looks in the mirror, staring. What stares back is a boy in a skirt. Oh gods he’s wearing a skirt. He’s got too long hair and a fucking skirt on.

He can’t really breath as he scrambles to take it off, throwing it somewhere in a corner of his room and sinking to the floor, hands buried in his much too long hair. What would his father say? What would his _mother_ say? They’d take it away, maybe destroy it in front of him so that he’d know he’s not allowed things like this. Cut his hair to something short and ugly that doesn’t feel good to run his hands through or flop onto his face.

He calms down eventually, pulling himself back together and standing again. He finds the skirt, crumpled up in a corner, and smooths his hands over it, trying to get the wrinkles out. He doesn’t put it back on that day, but he hangs it in the back of his closet, hidden behind clothes he no longer wears.

The next time Angus tries the skirt on, he’s had a good day, is in a good mood, and decides to try it when he isn’t an anxious mess.

The sight is much the same, a skinny fifteen year old boy with a wild mess of hair on his head and a skirt that’s just a smidge too big for him, but he can enjoy it more. It looks good against his skin, swishes nicely against his legs, feels good to rub his hands over in a comforting, constant motion. He shakes his hands out a couple times looking at himself, shakes his head back and forth to feel the length of his hair, feel comforted by it. He rubs circles with flat palms over the fabric of the skirt and it’s excellent.

He grows slowly more comfortable with the sight of himself wearing the skirt. He never wears it out of his room, but he does try different things, braids his hair back, pulls it into different hairstyles, wears the skirt with his hair like that, looks at what he can only call a more feminine version of himself. He still doesn’t want to be a boy, still doesn’t want to be a girl, but staring at himself in the mirror, hair done up in different ways or just puffed out around his face, spinning circles in the skirt to watch it fly out around him, he feels just a little more comfortable trying to be nothing.

Break is in a few days and he’s going back home to stay at the house Taako has with Kravitz and Lup and Barry. He debates over bringing the skirt along with him, but he’s been wearing it fairly often in his room, just sitting around in it, doing homework, grading, existing in his own space in an article of clothing he loves, and he doesn’t like the idea of not having it with him back home. He folds it carefully and puts it in the bottom of his bag incase anyone else ends up opening it for some reason, and he doesn’t like the little pit of fear sitting in his stomach, but it’s there.

“Hey little dude,” Lup says as she rips into the space with her scythe. “Here to pick you up for break.”

“Hello Miss Lup!” He says excitedly. He hasn’t seen or talked to her in a while, so he’s glad she’s the one to pick him up.

“Hey yourself Mr. Man,” she says with a grin, and he gives her what he thinks is a convincing smile back. She offers her hand and he grabs his bags up and takes it. Travelling through the rift is always an experience, but he’s grown used to it over the years.

There’s already noise in the house when they walk through into the living room, cooking noises and playful sounding banter from the kitchen, and Angus feels at ease. He loves staying at the school and working there, but this careful chaos is what he’s used to.

He drops his bag off in his room, closing the door when he leaves, and goes back out into the fray. “

“Hello!” He exclaims, greeting Taako, Kravitz, and Barry in the kitchen.

“Hello yourself, little man,” Taako says, throwing him a spoon. He catches it easily. “Come take over for Bones, he’s not the best in the kitchen.”

“And yet you’re the one who asked for my help,” Kravitz says, sounding a little miffed as he goes and joins Barry at the table, shortly joined by Lup as she comes into the kitchen.

“Aw babe, you know I love when you cook for me, but Ango just has more cooking finesse than you do.”

He takes over Kravitz’s spot stirring the pot. It looks almost done, the smell of spices hitting his nose before he even makes it over fully.

“Pozole?” He asks, leaning over the pot to dip the spoon in.

“Got it in one,” Taako says, slicing the knife he’s holding through the head of cabbage on the cutting board. “Figured it’s finally cold enough. Dinner’s almost done, thought you’d want to do at least a little stirring before we eat, though.”

He smiles down at the soup. He’s right, he does like being able to contribute to their food in some way, and he didn’t expect this to be the dish they ate tonight but he’s very very glad that it is because he love Pozole and Taako only makes it when it’s cold.

Dinner is fairly uneventful, save for the fact that he loves being home and feeling comfortable speaking up when he wants and moving when he wants and purely existing. He grins and bears his way through “boy” and “man” and the like because he doesn’t know what to do about it and there’s no way he’s bringing it up at dinner with all of them there.

Break goes by relatively fast, and he’s usually to busy to slip off to his room and wear the skirt for any kind of extended amount of time, but three days before break ends he get a night to himself for the most part, so he closes the door to his room and pulls it on, crossing his legs on his bed so they’re hidden under the length. He’s reading, leaned back on his pillows, when the knock comes.

“Yo, Mango, Barry and I are gonna play some board games if you wanna join.” Lup says through the door. He hears the handle turn a bit and he panics. There’s no time for him to change, no time for him to throw it off of him and have anything look normal.

The handle turns the rest of the way and pushes open. “It’s always better with more than two people,” she finishes off.

Angus is stuck, sitting straight up on the bed, hands clutching at the book so hard the pages are crinkling. He can do nothing but sit there, waiting, feeling that fear in his stomach take over his entire body.

“Oh cool, nice skirt dude. When’d you get that?” She says it so casually, like it’s not a shock, not a big deal that he’s wearing a skirt just in his room, alone. He gapes at her, watching as her face changes from open question to confused and a bit concerned. “Angus? You good?”

He opens his mouth to say something but he doesn’t have a voice anymore. His breath is gone and his eyesight is kinda fuzzy and his ears are ringing and he has no idea what to do.

The book gets taken from his hands and he panics more. He thinks he makes a noise and then hands are holding his.

“Hey, take a deep breath for me, alright? In and out, Angus. In and out.”

He squeezes his hands against hers pretty rapidly but she doesn’t say anything about it, just squeezes back occasionally. He follows her breathing, in and out and in and out again and again until the buzzing in his lips goes away and he can think a little clearer. Lup’s just sitting cross legged on his bed, hands still holding his, looking very, very concerned.

“Hey,” she says, noticing he’s back to himself. “You okay? Did I say something wrong? Probably should have waited until you said something to open the door like that.”

“N-no,” he says, staring at the purple covering his legs. “It’s my fault. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I’m sorry.”

“Whatcha apologizing for?” She cocks her head at him, brows furrowed, and he takes his hands back and motions jerkily to the skirt. Her brows furrow deeper and her mouth quirks down. “Kid, that’s not… that’s not bad. You don’t have to be sorry for wearing clothing you like.”

“I know,” he says, and she looks a little surprised. “I know that, but I should be comfortable with it if I’m going to. I should either be fully comfortable wearing things or shouldn’t wear them at all, but I don’t want anyone seeing because even _I_ don’t know what means and I don’t want other people trying to figure it out for me.”

It’s a big rush of words and he’s been keeping it stopped up inside of himself for the longest time. Lup blinks at him and her face softens, posture loosening. She gets a little smile on her face and Angus feels more confused than ever.

“We’re gonna talk about that first part in a second, but do you mind me calling Barry in here? I think him and I might be able to give you some advice on what you’re confused about there, Mango.”

He grips at his skirt a little, still not wanting anyone to see him in it. Lup is still bad enough. She eyes his hands.

“No is fine too. Or if you don’t mind him being in here but you wanna change you can do that while I go grab him?”

“Oh, um, yeah. The second one, I guess.” He’s not sure how Barry and Lup are going have insight on his situation but it might not hurt to find out.

“Okay!” She hops off the bed and goes over to the door. “I’ll knock and wait for you before coming in. Take your time!”

She shuts the door behind him and he breathes out harshly. The skirt comes off in a flurry of hand movements and he shoves it so far back into the closet that he can’t see it anymore. He pulls on some jeans and a sweater, sitting back on the bed and pulling his hair back in a ponytail. Lup takes another few minutes to get back, but true to her word she knocks and waits.

“Come in,” he calls, drawing his knees up and wrapping his arms around them. Lup comes in and plops herself on the end of the bed, dragging Barry down with her. He sits up, scrunching his face at Lup.

“So,” Barry says. “Lup gave me a rundown of what happened, but I’m pretty sure that’s not everything, so do you wanna start?”

“Um,” Angus says, and suddenly this is horrible. He’ll get scolded and they’ll tell Taako and Kravitz and it’ll be horrible. Barry seems to sense his discomfort because he backs off a bit.

“Ah, gods, sorry that sounds so accusatory. It just felt like there was more to you wearing a skirt than you let on.”

“I’m really confused,” he says honestly “I don’t… I’ve felt uncomfortable? I guess? Being called a boy and a man and things like that. I’m not a girl. I know that. But I don’t want to be a boy I don’t think. And I’d like to wear skirts and dresses and nail polish and have my hair in cool styles but it’s too feminine for me. To do. And I know it shouldn’t be because Taako does whatever he wants and doesn’t let anyone tell him otherwise but it just feels _wrong_.”

“Ah,” Lup says, stretching her arms out. “The beginnings of trans feelings. Always fun.”

“I said I’m not a girl,” he says, a little frustrated. Did she not hear him?

“Oh I know,” she says. And then she looks at him. “Oh kid, there’s more than just boy and girl, you know that right?”

He stares at her, silent. He’s trying to think of people he knows that aren’t a boy or a girl. There’s Roswell, but they’re a bird and that doesn’t really count since they were technically two things. He can’t think of anybody.

“What?” He says finally, squeezing his hands tighter around his legs.

“Lup, you’ve gotta give him our credentials in this,” Barry says, taking over. “The only reason Lup grabbed me for this conversation is because we’re broth trans. So we’ve got some experience in what you’re going through right now. I mean, we’re both binary trans so it’s a little different, but there’s still places where it overlaps.”

“Oh,” he says, and he feels a bit more at ease. They know, or they know some of it, and that makes things better. “Okay.”

“Angus, we’re about to blow your whole fuckin’ mind,” Lup says, and she looks almost excited.

“Can you explain what you said? About there being more than just boy and girl?”

“Yeah. So there’s a million genders out there, kid. I’m honestly pretty sure no one’s ever the same gender, but that’s for a different time. For our purposes, let’s look at it like this.” She puts her hands up apart from each other. “This hand is girl and this hand is boy. You see all this space in between? There’s any number of genders between here. You could lean towards one side or the other or be both or neither or right in the middle. You get to choose. No one else gets to choose for you.”

“Are… are there words for it?” He asks quietly. He’s never heard this before. He knew there were trans people, knew there were binary trans people at least, but he’s never even heard of genders outside of that.

“A lot,” Barry says, and he looks happy too. Angus feels a little giddy. “Genderqueer, agender, nonbinary, genderfluid, a bunch of other ones that I can name if you don’t think those fit at all.”

“Also you don’t have to pick a word, now or ever. Don’t feel pressured to label yourself for other people’s comfort. You can just be Angus, or whatever name you feel comfortable with, and that’s that.”

Nonbinary sounds the best out of that list. Not part of the binary. He likes it. He likes how detached from boy or girl it is, how it separates him. “Nonbinary feels good.”

“Nice,” Lup says. “You wanna talk pronouns?”

“Are there more of those too?”

“Oh absolutely,” Barry says, and Angus thinks Lup was right about blowing his mind. He doesn’t have to use he if he doesn’t want to, and it feels like a weight is being lifted off his chest.

“A lot of nonbinary people use they/them as a pronoun set, but some people use binary pronouns, or ze/zir, ey/em, some other ones. Really whatever you feel comfortable with goes.”

He’s heard they used before, and he thinks he could like that one, with enough practice. Everything feels weird right now, but they sounds better than he right now.

“Would, um, you be able to use they? For me?”

“Yeah, Ango,” and Angus doesn’t think Lup’s ever look that fond of them before. “We can definitely do that. You still okay with Angus?”

“Mhm,” they say, and thinking about changing their name is an interesting thought, but not one they really want to entertain. Angus feels fine, they’ve never felt bad being called that before, but maybe one day they’ll change it. Who knows? “Angus is fine.”

Lup nods and Barry sits back, looking contented, and then Lup purses her lips. “What you said before, about the skirt. You don’t have to completely comfortable with things immediately. If you just want to keep skirts and clothing like that a you thing that stays in your room and no one else gets to see, that’s fine. Or if you want to wear them out, that’s fine too! If you want to practice over the last few days of break, you can, you know. We could paint our nails tonight if you want and then take it off before you go back to school.”

They think about it, painting their nails and taking it off before they have to face the real world again, and it sounds okay. They nod.

“Mkay. And also, it’s not a now or never thing. You’ve got time to grow into things. I know I was comfortable being myself because me and Taako have always been pretty gender fucky, but plenty of people don’t come into themselves for a while. And you can take it slowly. You can start with just home and then move out to friends or work or school, or you can do it all at once, or just stick with a select few people for your whole life. You can be whoever you want wherever you want, Angus, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

They nod and Lup looks satisfied. “Alright. I’m gonna go get some nail polish together. You wear whatever you want out there, and I’ll paint your nails whatever color you want.”

Lup and Barry leave, closing the door behind them, and Angus breathes. That was the most enlightening conversation they’ve had in a long time. Getting used to they will be interesting, but it feels better, it feels better than he and being called a boy does. Nonbinary. That’s a label they can handle.

They leave the sweater on but pull the skirt back out, shaking hands pulling it up over their hips and settling the zipper and the button in place. They take their hair out of the ponytail, shake it out to make it loose again, let it sit against their face how they like. With the sweater, black and color speckled and a little baggy, and the skirt, dark purple and floofy against their legs, and their hair puffed out around their face, they look just shy of comfortable in the mirror when they look. They like how this outfit sits on them, how it makes them look, even with the gangly limbs and harsh angles.

Lup’s waiting for them in the living room, Barry sitting on the couch with his own nail polish, a cool dark blue.

“Alright Mango. Pick any color.” She has a spread of color in front of her, rainbow order so its easier for them to process, and they think. Eventually, their eyes land on a silver purple metallic one and they point, readying themself. Lup grins and grabs it, shaking it up and motioning them to sit.

“Alright, hands out. I know you get fidgety sometimes so just lemme know if you need a break. We’ll do one at a time so you can move the other hand without worrying about the polish smearing, okay?”

“Okay,” they say, fanning out a hand. Lup takes it in hers and begins, painting with the tiny tiny brush.

It takes longer than they expected, and they’re patient and flick out their other hand when they get a little jittery. The end result shimmers differently every time they shift their hands and they stare, admiring the work.

“Alright, you do me.” Lup grabs a red orange from the lineup and fans out a hand. Angus stares for a moment.

“I’ve never done it before.”

“That’s why we gotta get some practice in. It’s easier to paint other people’s nails than your own, and we can just clean up with nail polish remover if you make too big of a mess. It comes off skin in hot water anyway.”

“Alright,” they say, voice determined. They grab the nail polish and mimic Lup from earlier, shaking it up and uncapping it. Barry joins them on the floor, leaning on Lup’s shoulder. His nails are dry now, dark blue and shiny. The first stroke of the brush is a little shaky, and that finger gets too much paint on the edges and her skin, but Lup never stops them, never tells them to do better, just gives pointers and watches.

The finished result is halfway decent and when they dry all the way Lup scrubs her hands under hot water, removing the excess polish.

The three of them end up playing board games and card games for a good part of the night, and Angus gets less nervous about the skirt as the night continues. Eventually, they get sleepy, fall half asleep resting on the couch, and Lup maneuvers them into a more comfortable position. They’re half asleep for a while, dosing on couch cushions, and then the rift happens.

Taako and Kravitz come back home, date night officially over, but Angus still pretends to be asleep.

“Hey Lulu,” Taako says quietly. There’s a pause and then, “Ango wearing a skirt?”

“They are,” Lup says at the same volume.

Another pause. “They?”

“The two of you should probably talk to them tomorrow. Separate so they don’t get spooked again. Tonight started pretty bad but ended really well and I don’t wanna undo that.”

“Of course,” Kravitz says, and he doesn’t sound any kind of put off by this. Angus feels something swell in their chest and they tamp it down. “Will they want us to ask first?”

“I think it’ll be fine,” Barry says. “They just got a lot of answers to questions they didn’t even know existed tonight, so be careful how you do it.”

There’s more talking, but it’s a bit more hazy, further away, and they drift back into sleep.

They way up in their bed in pajamas, which is better than having to confront this in the skirt, so they’re grateful to whoever did that. They stretch out, place their glasses on their face, and get up for the day.

Kravitz is in the kitchen, nursing a cup of coffee, and Angus says a quiet hello as they pour themselves a glass of apple juice.

“Good morning Angus,” he says, and they can tell he’s thinking. “Lup and Barry mentioned something about talking to you this morning. About something fairly important?”

“Yes,” they say, taking a drink of the juice to steady themself. “It’s, um. I guess… I’m nonbinary? And I want to use they/them pronouns for at least a little bit. And Angus is still fine as a name.”

They don’t look at Kravitz, staring into their glass. They can see the shimmery purple of their nails, can feel how long their hair is, brushing at their neck, and it makes them anxious, makes this almost harder.

“Okay,” Kravitz says. Angus knows there won’t be a rejection, but they still brace for one. “Of course. Is there anything else you want me to know?”

They smile and blink a couple times, jumping a leg. “No. I don’t think, um, anything else is really big. I might start wearing skirts and stuff around the house?”

“Alright.” It’s quiet for a moment. “I love you Angus, very much so, and I’m glad you felt alright to tell me this. I’ll admit, I might slip up a few times on pronouns at first, but I promise you I’ll do my best and get it down quickly.”

Angus looks at him, eyes a little damp, and Kravitz’s face is so open and honest that it hurts a little.

“Thank you,” they choke out, a quiet whisper.

“Of course,” he says, standing and coming over to them. “It’s— can I hug you?”

They nod and put the juice down and Kravitz wraps his arms around them. Angus returns the hug tightly, pressing their face to his shoulder. This feels right. They feel good.

This went better than they ever really expected or hoped it would.

Taako is next, and they wait until lunch, pulling that sweater on again but this time just a pair of pants, not the skirt. Not yet. Not until after.

“Do you need help?” They ask, coming into the kitchen and washing their hands.

“Sure, bubeleh, grab a knife.”

They grab a paring knife and Taako hands them a pepper. There’s a few more on the counter for when they’re done.

“I, um,” they start and stumble, pausing for a moment to catch their bearings. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Lup mentioned that last night.”

“Right,” they say, meek, slicing up the pepper and moving onto the next one. “It’s uh, about me. I, um, I’m nonbinary? I think? And I want to try using they/them pronouns for a little bit. And maybe wearing skirts and dresses, maybe, at home, sometimes.”

“Cool,” he says, mixing up some spices for the meat he’s cooking. “You and Lup and Barry talk about it last night?”

“Mhm,” they say, adding to the pile of pepper. “Lup, um, she came into my room while I was wearing a skirt and I might have freaked out a little bit so her and Barry explained some stuff to me and a lot of things made sense.”

“Yeah, those two are pretty good at that.” Taako seems… a little off.

“Are you alright, Taako?”

He laughs a bit, looking at them. “Course I am, kid. Just… wondering why you dind’t ask any of us, I guess. Why not ask me?”

Ah. He’s jealous, and while this is kind of a weird thing to get jealous over, Angus and Taako are fairly close, so they get it. “I knew it was okay for boys to wear skirts and makeup and nail polish and all of that, but it didn’t feel like I could because it wasn’t proper. And you never take no for an answer from anyone, and I thought it would be too weird to ask you. You’re so confident in how you present yourself always and I just, I’m not.”

“Even about the gender stuff?”

“I didn’t know the gender stuff existed until last night, so I didn’t even know what to ask.”

“Jeez, kid,” he says, and he sounds a little less upset, and they’re glad. “Guess that’s fair. Alright. Alright. Well, I’m glad you’re figuring stuff out. You using all of that anywhere else but home?”

“Not yet. I’m working up to that.”

“Oh that’s real fucking fair. Lucas gives you any trouble over it once you get around to that just tell me and I’ll blast his ass halfway across the world. That’s a promise.”

“Okay, Taako,” they laugh, and they can see him smile in the corner of their eye. “Thanks.”

“Just doing my job, pumpkin. Making sure people aren’t assholes to you.”

They slice up the last pepper and add it all to the meat that’s cooking, stirring it with the wooden spoon. Taako adds pointers so they don’t mess up lunch, and it devolves into comfortable talking. The other three come in at some point, all of them affirming and cheerful and it’s excellent.

Things have moved very fast in the past twenty four hours, and they’ve discovered a million new things about themself, but it’s good. Angus McDonald may still be the world’s greatest detective, but even the world’s greatest needs some extra help sometimes.

“Alright!” they say, dishing up the pepper and chicken mix. “Lunch is served.”

They smile as everyone grabs their plate, and Taako ruffles their hair fondly and there’s not a doubt in their mind that this was the best outcome, coming to conclusions with their family about things they weren’t sure were real and having their identity upheld by the other two members of their household. This is the best they’ve felt in months, and they’re perfectly content to stay right here.

**Author's Note:**

> nonbinary angus is real important to me and you can pry that headcanon form my cold dead hands.  
> this was gonna be a more taako and angus focused fic but u kno? sometimes u just need an elder queer trans to handle your id crisis. I dont write them interacting a lot so this was fun!  
> I love a nonbinary headcanon, and i love a trans headcanon, and i love angus, so this really was inevitable


End file.
